Valentines FAIL

Hey guys Lucky Wing here. Look who came crawling back here.

Me!

🙇

I am SO sorry! Once again, i have messed up. Whoo hoo.

First of, I am so sorry i haven’t posted recently! If you don’t read my other blog, Luckily Bizarre, (Which you should if you don’t) i’ll tell you that i am WAY too busy over there! I haven’t posted on here since the 9th! What is my problem? Well, to make up for it, I’m going to do a Valentine’s special! Now, I know, it’s not Valentine’s anymore, but I started it then, in my defense. So it’s taken me 2 days. In retrospect, I shoulda just posted it in parts, but I didn’t think to. XP Anyways, welcome to ValiSHIPPING day!

Characters:

Me: Me. The literal me. E, myself and I.

LW: Lucky Wing, from my Fanfic.

PC: Perfect Cheetah, NOT Purple Claw. Cheetah’s also from my Fanfic.

BB: Binary Bard, aka Binary.

BW: Black Widow, aka Widow.

CC: Captain Crawfish

DH: Dr Hare

DD: Director D, aka D

GG: Gretchen Grimlock, aka Gretchie

Shipping Day!

Me: (pulls out a megaphone) EVERYONE GET OVER HERE NOW!!!

(Lucky Wing, Perfect Cheetah, Binary Bard, Black Widow, Captain Crawfish, Dr Hare, Director D, Gretchen Grimlock,

LW: What is it?

Me: Valentine’s day, naturally!

BW: Your shirt literally says “#4everAlone.”

Me: Yes. Well, I’m going to be. You guys, however, are not.

(Dead silence.)

DH: Well then. I just remembered something extremely important I need to go do! Guess I’ll just go…

Me: Nope! *Grabs his collar* You all are lucky enough to be part of this!

LW: Some one hide me.

Me: No way! You’re first off!

LW: (turns pink) Oh. Lucky me.

Me: Actually you are! I’m not going to spoil any of the ships that happen in my Fanfic, so you’re sort of safe.

LW: Sort of?

Me: Well, my friend, Popular Wolf was doing a shipping thing, so I entered you!

LW: W-what?

Me: Don’t worry, I was very nice about you.

LW: 0_0

Me: Do you want me to read what I said to make you feel better?

LW: No.

Me: (Pulls out sheet of paper) Alright!

“Name: Lucky Wing
Age: 19
Interests: Adventuring, exploring, a bit of FUN
Personality: Exuberant, Happy-go-Lucky, acts like she’s from old Britain… (She’s an Astroknight’s girl.)
Eye Color: Bright blu
Zodiac: Pisces
Fav Color: Also blu”

LW: You told her where I am from?!?

Me: Yeah, sorry. It was really important. (Mutters) It was also rather obvious…

LW: What was that?

Me: Nothing! *Coughs* Anyways, I got the results back this afternoon, wanna hear them?

PC: Yes!

LW: No!

Me: Sorry Lucky, but I’m totally gonna read it. Ah hem. “Now, Lucky Wing… You were more difficult. You even said Lucky Wing had a special someone 😉

LW: (Magenta) Wh-AT?! I do not!

Me: Not yet.

LW: WHAT?!

Me: (realizes life is in danger) Whoa! Calm down! Look, it’s fate! You will all find some one, we’ve been over this.

LW: No, we have not.

Me: … We need to then.

BB: But I thought you were forever alone.

Me: LATER!! May I finish?

CC: YES!

GG: You’re eager.

LW: Why are you all against me here?

All villains: BECAUSE YOU ALWAYS GET IN OUR WAY!!!

LW: (Blown back) Oh my.

Me: Oops.

LW: What?

Me: Well there’s more! Ahem! “But Madame Petra tried her hardest to bring you… Gawaine! He is an icy knight who has…  a connection to Mordred. He distanced himself from his family in order to prevent more of his loved ones getting killed (this is all true junk). The third strongest knight, he is loyal and will protect you to the end. Another possible match is Edgar. He is a beast (you get it) and has a sweet tooth. He’ll do anything to help his friends.” (looks up) Aww, that’s sweet!

LW: *Deep magenta* … Oh my.

Me: I like it! It’s so cute! It actually makes sense too!

LW: Please tell me i don’t end up with Galwaine.

Me: No, you don’t.

LW: And who’s Edgar?

Me: No one you need to worry about yet, you don’t end up with him either. Anyways, it’s time to pull out the Ship Wheel!

DD: *Pales* I thought you were kidding.

Me: Oh I was. At the time. (Pulls out wheel) Ta da!!

Pic

BW: What. The heck. Is that.

Me: my shipping wheel! I have all my Poptropican ships on here!

BB: Why are some of them scribbled out?

Me: Spoilers.

PC: That doesn’t answer the question.

Me: Moving on, everyone pick a number. There are (counts them) hmm, 7 of you. But Lucky’s is entirely scribbled out and I already did her anyways. K, pick your numbers!!

DH: 2

GG: 3

CC: 5

DD: 1

PC: 6

BB: 4

Me: Alright, great! But the ones that are scribbled out…

CC: There be 2 scribbled out entirely.

Me: … Be. Really?

CC: Look kid, I be a pirate. (Lowers voice) I also get more treasure if I talk like this.

Me: … Uh huh.

PC: Can you answer the question please?!

Me: Alright, yes. There’s a couple of ships that are private and only involve some of my characters. And we gotta handle spoiler ships!

DD: The what?

Me: K, so… D, Cheetah and Binary, your ships aren’t being covered. They’re the spoiler ships!!

PC: That canNOT be a thing.

Me: It is! But I can tell everyone if you want. (Grins evilly)

PC: Never mind! I meant the name, not the secrecy anyways.

Me: You sure?

PC: Yes!

Me: Thought so… K, so that leaves.. Gretchie, Hare, Widow and Crawfish!

BW: Lucky us.

LW: Can I leave then?

Me: No. (Rolls dice) 4, Binary’s free, no. (Rolls again) 3! Gretchie!

GG: *Pales* What?!

Me: Ah ha, I love this one!

GG: No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no…

Me: Well, it’s not so much of a ship than it was a ship.

GG: No no no no no no n- (PC covers her mouth)

PC: No.

Me: *Snerk* Well… Gretchie used to be with… Harold Mews!!

GG: (groans) Nooooo…..

Me: But the two of you broke up because you wanted to capture Bigfoot for display etcetera, then you got that scar and was bitter and decided to go steal his money and dishonor him and I don’t know where the two of you are at right now.

BB: There were way too many “ands” in that sentence.

BW: You call yourself an author?

Me: Ow. Yes, I am an author, but I am also an extremely busy teenage girl.

GG: You are so dead.

Me: Um, no. No killing people here, you all signed the contract.

PC: Is maiming still in?

Me: No.

PC: Drat.

Me: What is wrong with you people?

PC: I dunno. You wrote this.

Me: Don’t break the fourth wall.

PC: Try and stop me.

Me: *sighs* OK, next roll. 5! (Grins manically) Crawfish.

CC: CAPTAIN- … Oh. No. No no no no-

PC: Enough.

Me: (still grinning evilly) Oh yes. Remember when I told you I’d find you a good ship?

CC: You never got me a boat.

Me: Well i- wait, boat?

CC: Aye.

Me: … I may have messed this up. Does anyone else not know what a ship is? (Pause) Not the boat kind! (Still nothing) Good.

PC: D, you know what a ship is?

DD: Yes.

LW: But I thought you were in your late 30s!

DD: I’m 23!

GG: But you’re ba-

Me: Back to me people! Thank you. We’re just gonna skip Crawfish, since I don’t really have a ship for him. Anyways, if I did, she’d probably die.

GG: You said no killing!

Me: Never mind! I’ll explain later!

BW: Or never.

Me: You’re still on the line Widow. I’d be careful if I were you. Next roll! (Starts rolling) 4, still Binary. Another 4. Wow. Here we go, 6!

PC: That’s me.

Me: … Never mind! (Keeps rolling) 3! Already did her! 5! Already did him! Another 5! 4, 3, 1, 3, 1… Wait…

DD: What?

Me: Widow didn’t give me a number!

BW: Oops. (Grins slyly)

Me: -_- OK then. Since it’s just you and Hare, he’s evens, you’re odds. (Rolls) Lucky you! A 1!

BW: (scowls) Great.

LW: Oh good!

BW: Oh no no no no…

Me: (looks at paper) Uh oh.

BW: Uh oh?!?!

Me: K, you don’t actually have a ship. The one I sort of had is once again, in question. He might turn out to be some one else.

BW: Oh. OK. (Turns around and does a fist pump)

Me: I can tell that you’re absolutely crushed.

BW: Yes.

Me: That was sarcasm.

BW: So was mine.

Me: I see. That leaves… Dr Hare!!!

DH: (in the corner, eating carrots) What?

Me: Be ready for PAIN!

DH: What? Oh. Oh no no no-

PC: If one more person says the word no, I’ll scream.

Me: … Well then… I was clearly unprepared.

BW: You don’t have one for him either, do you.

Me: … Maybe?

PC: Nope.

Me: No, it’s actually quite literally “maybe?” I don’t know yet.

CC: You claimed to be prepared.

Me: I have never claimed that. And I never will.

PC: *Snerk*

Me: Well, I think that’s it! So now-

LW: We forgot some one.

Me: We did? (Counts on fingers) No we didn’t. Who?

LW: You.

Me: I don’t have any ships.

PC: You’re lying.

Me: What are you, a human lie detector?

PC: Yes. Deal.

LW: So I will start with who other people have shipped you with!

Me: Is that my laptop?!

LW: Well, you don’t actually own it…

Me: It is, isn’t it.

LW: People have shipped you with… Slenderman, Lord Voldemort, G, SF…

PC: Which one?

LW: No idea. And you ship yourself with some people!

Me: Do not.

LW: Fictional people.

Me: You are not reading that.

LW: Your Ninjago ship is…

Me: NOPE! (Grabs laptop and runs)

DH: You didn’t actually know, did you?

LW: No, I did not. I figured she had one though.

PC: So… I’m outta here. Let’s end off the story. The end!

 

*Sigh* Cheetah and her breaking the fourth wall. Just no. (A yell is heard from the distance.) Uh oh. Lucky Wing signing out, bai guys!

PS: Look at the link below for PW’s full thing! It’s awesome!

https://poptropicanewscenter.wordpress.com/2017/02/14/sail-or-sink/

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29 thoughts on “Valentines FAIL

  1. O m z
    😀 this was pretty funny
    IS BB SHIPPED WITH ME
    BC IF HE IS IM GOING TO DIE OF HAPPINESS
    lol prolly not though considering you have your characters all set up
    (I can’t wait for the Mordred arc of Wolff’s Bane to be published AHHH everyone is gonna be mind blown ♥♥♥)
    It’s Elyana isn’t it
    just know that she and PW are mortal enemies
    and PW may or may not have punched her in the face
    multiple times
    *nervous laughter*
    *rolls away on swivel chair awkwardly*

    Liked by 1 person

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