Ask the Villains #23, rated G for Funny

E: *working on homework*

Poptropica: Hey Miss E?

E: *distractedly* Yes?

Poptropica: Weren’t you going to do something?

E: *still distracted* I dunno, wrote up the AtV. Have homework stuff. IDK.

Poptropica: I’m going to call Mister Harvey and see if he knows. Can I use your phone?

E: *still still distracted* Yeah, sure.

Poptropica: Yay! *Picks up phone and calls Dr Hare on speaker*

Dr Hare: Hello, Dr Hare speaking?

Poptropica: Hi Mister Hare! Can you bring over cookies?! Miss E wanted you to!

Dr Hare: Um… Sure. What’s going on?

Poptropica: Nothing much. Did you know E sleeps with a stuffed animal at night?

E: Waitasecond what?! You give me back that phone!!

Poptropica: *giggles impishly*

Dr Hare: So… What’s going on?!

E: *facepalms* My child has discovered the magical world of prank calling. I’m kind of proud of him TBH…

Poptropica: Do you remember what Miss E forgot?

Dr Hare: Um… She hasn’t posted the AtV yet, but-

E: I didn’t post it?!

Dr Hare: No, you-

E: HOLY FRIDGE I’ll be back! *Runs off*

*Pause*

Poptropica: Do you want to come watch funny skits with us on YouTube later?

Dr Hare: Sure.

Hey guys, Lucky Wing here! I’m really sorry this is so late! I have a crazy ton of homework from the days I missed! Thank goodness for harvest break, I’d be dead if it weren’t for it! To the Qs!

(Ok, here are your Qs from last week. Sorry again peeps! -E, who’s still editor)

Sporty Boa To Everyone: Play Tug of War! Team 1: Black Widow, CC & DH. Team 2: E, Binary Bard & DD! Who will win?

E: I have rope in the back, you guys up for it?

Black Widow: -_- This is a terrible idea.

E: Which is why we’re doing it, yes?

Black Widow: Whatever.

E: Pop, you’re the judge!

Poptropica: Wait, what?

(10 minutes later)

Poptropica: OK, 3, 2, 1, go!

E: Oof!

Binary Bard: I think we’re losing!

E: I think I have little upper body strength!

Director D: I really don’t see much point in this.

E: Are you even pulling? You’re behind me, I can’t tell.

Black Widow: Are you guys even trying?!

Binary Bard/E: Shut it Wid!

Captain Crawfish: Argh, we be winning!

E: -_- Ok, screw this. *Lets go of the rope and tackles Dr Hare*

Dr Hare: Hey!

Poptropica: Binary’s team wins!

E: Success!

Dr Hare: Can I get up now?

E: No.

.

Incredible Cat to BB: Nice hat. Where didja get it? 

Binary Bard: I made it?

E: You can sew?

Binary Bard: So-so.

E: OH!

(PIC w/ them in shades)

Dr Hare: Do I even want to know?

E: No.

.

Bendy Flyer To CC: Do you like to eat raw fish or crawfish?

Captain Crawfish: -_- What is with all the fish.

E: Don’t blame me, blame thy name.

Captain Crawfish: But why-

E: ARGH! Don’t be asking questions, but be answering thy own!

Captain Crawfish: What.

E: I missed talk like a pirate day, don’t judge me…

Captain Crawfish: I can’t promise that lassy.

.

To all the villains: About how old are you guys?

E: Hey hey! Finally the question I’ve been waiting for!

Dr Hare: You have?

E: I have literally no idea how old Crawfish is.

Black Widow: But he’s not here.

E: … GOSH DARN IT! Where did he go?

Binary Bard: I think he went home to take a nap.

E: Dangit.

Black Widow: Whatever, I’ll start. I’m 25.

Director D: *sighs* Since Miss Elyana spoiled it an earlier episode, I am 23.

Poptropica: 10, but I think they know that.

Binary Bard: I’m 22. James is 38.

E: I knew it! Wait, really?

Black Widow: Yeah.

E: I thought he was on his 40s, what with his gray hair.

Binary Bard: It’s kind of a sensitive topic for him.

E: Oh. Ok.

Director D: As well as I have gray hair Elyana.

E: But it’s a… I’m just not gonna comment. I’m 16, y’all know that. Hit the halfway mark August… Holy crap! I’m old!

Black Widow: -_- We’re literally all older than you.

E: Right, sorry. I just… I’m not ready to adult yet, much less hit 17! Aaaaaaaah… *Shivers* Anyways, sorry. We all know for Harvey, 20, right?

Dr Hare: Actually…

E: Wait, what? How? Please tell me you weren’t lying before.

Dr Hare: No, I wasn’t! It’s actually my birthday today, but-

E: Sayth whaaaaaaaat?!!

Dr Hare: It’s not a big deal or anything, I just-

E: No, this is a big deal! You can… Drink… now…*pause* There’s good stuff too! You can legally adopt!

Dr Hare: Who would I adopt?

E: Pop.

Poptropica: Wait, what?

E: Never mind. It’s still your birthday! We are gosh darn it gonna celebrate!

Dr Hare: El, honestly, it’s fine, I wasn’t going to be make a big deal out of it…

E: Oh. I’m still getting you something, you can’t stop me. *Hugs him* Happy birthday, you’re a nerd.

Dr Hare: Oh. Um, thanks?

E: Welcome. *Let’s go, smiles, and walks off* It’s been all the birthdays. First my brother, then my sis and dad, Jaiden Animations to boot, my friend Shimpy… Y’all need to stop getting old!

Black Widow: That just made your day, didn’t it?

Dr Hare: Made it better.

.

DjAlexaHattomi to BW: nvm, another person in the parallel universe made you break up

Black Widow: Should I feel bad about this? I have no idea what’s going on.

E: Yay dimensional chaos. Yay rejection. Yay life.

Black Widow: What, have you felt rejection?

E: Why the Frigg does everyone ask that?! It’s not that hard to believe, is it?

Black Widow: You said you’ve only ever been on one date.

E: 2 now, if you include the one with Harvey. *Sighs* Look, we’ve all had crushes, right? I’ve felt rejection, but that’s probably a story for another time.

Black Widow: -_- You can’t just leave people hanging E.

E: Fine. *Turns* Hey viewers! If you want to know, ask next week, I’m too tired to do it now!

Black Widow: Or too lazy.

E: That too.

.

 

To DH: you’re mentioned because it’s a small world, aight? (…it’s a small POPTROPICA WORLD)

Dr Hare: What?

E: *starts singing* It’s a small world after all! It’s a small world after all! It’s a small world after all! It’s a small, small world! *Jazz hands* Fabulous.

Dr Hare: *laughs* El, what the heck?

E: It’s a small world. What can I say?

Dr Hare: You have a nice voice.

E: *flushes* Not really… But thanks.

Dr Hare: No, really, that sounded great!

E: *blushing harder* Oh gosh… I… Thanks.

Dr Hare: *mystified* You’re welcome.

(In conclusion I have no idea how to take a compliment. At all.)

.

To everyone: because I’m just curious, what are your thoughts on apple juice

E: First off, small video game child, have you had apple juice? I don’t know how your dimension works.

Poptropica: I have.

Black Widow: You’re good with kids.

E: Shut it Blackie.

Black Widow: -_- Excuse me?

E: I’m going to die later for this. ANYWAYS, I like some juice alright, tho I like OJ more. Which is kind of an Eve thing.

Poptropica: Who’s Eve?

E: Uh… She’s… She was…

Dr Hare: Isn’t she your RP character?

E: Not anymore… I lost her a while ago… *Starts tearing up* OK I’m not going to cry on a question about apple juice! I think we’re done here!

Dr Hare: Are you OK? Do you need a hug or something?

Poptropica: I got some tissues.

E: I’m fine and I freaking love you guys.

.

To E: get well soon fam. don’t worry about the pic on Discord, I won’t be able to get it anyway due to both my grounding and the most recent events in the parallel universe sooooooooooooooo yeah

E: You guys are the best, seriously. Thank you all for your support, it made me feel tons better. (I also agree with Alexa, it’s funnier when one’s sick sometimes.) Wednesday I was able to go to school, there’s Thursday too and I’m doing a ton better, even if I’m weaker than I usually am. Well, after that PSA, the rest of the Q. I’m sorry you’re grounded. If I got grounded every time my grade dropped… Well, I’d be grounded every time I got sick. Nah, my mom doesn’t do that, but she does make me stay home sometimes and work on homework if I have a ton. Like I do now. Yay school. Also good luck on the those recent events. You need it fam.

Poptropica: That made no sense.

E: It’s time you learned young Padawan… I rarely make sense.

Poptropica: I think I already figured that out.

E: *ruffles his hair* Then you will go far my child.

Poptropica: Yay.

.

to lucky: how’s your karma

Lucky Wing RoP:  My karma? Well… E has this saying, I guess.

E: A couple of people at school call me Lucky, actually. Fun fact. You can say the quote tho.

Lucky Wing RoP: “I might be lucky, but it is not all good luck.”

E: There ya have it. Karma no like me. It’s alright with her though.

Lucky Wing RoP: -_- No. It is not.

E: Never mind then.

.

Purple Claw to captain crawfish: do u love me

Captain Crawfish: What?

E: PC, is there something I should know about? *Laughs* Kidding, kidding.

Captain Crawfish: No… Who is this?

E: My friend. Purple Claw. I almost ship this.

Captain Crawfish: You have a weird obsession with boats.

E: *pauses, then pokes head out door* Guys! I thought someone was going to explain what a ship was to James!

Black Widow: *mutters under breath* I’ll do it later!

E: Do it now!

Captain Crawfish: What is happening…

.

(Oh yeah, this is sort of something from DHAlexaHattomi’s Q&A. All will be revealed.)

to E: itch here. you know what this is for. *drops fridge on E’s head*

E: *screams and jumps back just in time*

Dr Hare: What the heck?!

E: My life just flashed before my eyes…

Dr Hare: Are you OK?!

E: Yes. No. I almost just died. I don’t have powers BTW people and the ramifications of my death freaking STINK!

Dr Hare: Um… Why did someone drop a fridge on your head?

E: *brushes hair out of eyes* I had a misunderstanding with someone in another Q&A and Itch tried to drop a fridge in my head. I think it’s sorted out now tho… I hope.

Dr Hare: Who are these people?

E: Well, they’re… Idea moment.

Poptropica: Don’t get me involved please.

E: You might already be. I’m gonna go email Vampi, I have an idea!

Dr Hare/Poptropica: What?!

E: You’ll see!

.

Red Rider to E: Awww, you have a kid. Who’s the father *throws hands on mouth*

E: *Turns scarlet* I walked into that so many times, who am I kidding? *Buries face into hands* I… I’m not his mom, ok? Even if I were Pop’s mother, I don’t know who-

Binary Bard: Dr Hare.

E: Wha- NO SHUT UP

Binary Bard: He can legally adopt.

E: STOP IT YOU ARE A TERRIBLE HUMAN BEING

Binary Bard: No, I’m not.

E: FINE BUT YOU STILL ARE TERRIBLE

Binary Bard: That I can agree with. But you know I’m right.

E: * hmphs* No, you’re not, shut up.

Binary Bard: I think I am. Do you want me to go ask?

E: Don’t you DARE-

Binary Bard: Hey Dr Hare, do you-

E: It’s his birthday you git!

Binary Bard: Oh. Guess you’re right.

E: *sighs in relief*

Binary Bard: Next week though…

E: I will destroy you.

.

So yeah. People get tackled, tears are nearly shed, argh, I nearly died and HOLY CRAP I ALMOST FORGOT!

Poptropica: What?

E: I don’t wanna send you back…

Poptropica: Oh. Oh right, that’s what we forgot.

E: I can’t do this today, I can’t do this today, I can’t do this at ALL! *The doorbell rings* What the flip. Who’s-

Poptropica: *opens the door* Hi Mister Harvey!

Dr Hare: Hey kiddo. *Ruffles his hair* How’s it going El?

E: I can’t decide what to do and I’m freaking out.

Dr Hare: With…

E: *points “discreetly” at Poptropica*

Poptropica: What?

Dr Hare/E: Nothing!

Dr Hare: Why don’t you go set up a movie or something for us to watch, Ok? Miss E and I will get the cookies ready.

Poptropica: Ok! *Runs off*

E: *impressed* Wow.

Dr Hare: I have my ways. Honestly El, if I were you, I’d just leave it up to your viewers, they’re the ones who read it.

E: Wow, that’s… Perfect.

Dr Hare: Thanks.

Poptropica: Are you guys ok with watching Miraculous Ladybug?

E: YES I have trained you well.

Dr Hare: Wow. You got a ten year old boy to watch Miraculous Ladybug with you?

E: Dude, I usually watch it with a twenty year old. Twenty one now.

Dr Hare: Oh gosh, I almost forgot.

E: I might not let you forget. Now cookies and cartoons!

Dr Hare: Cookies and cartoons!

If you want to ask a question, dare, challenge, date, IDK whatever, the rules are simple: Ask whoever you’d like, keep it clean and appropriate (or else we shall BURN DESTROY you), put it in the comments or send it to E or Lucky Wing on Discord and, above all, have fun! You can do dares, asks, all that. The main 6 people to ask are Dr Hare🐰, Director D🔎, Black Widow🐞, Captain Crawfish⛵, Binary Bard🃏, and, apparently, me, aka E, Ele, Elyana, that one person, or the Admin/mod.🌱 Also Lucky Wing 🍀 from my Fanfiction, Rulers of Poptropica. You can also ask any Villain you want, we’re just the ones who run this. You can ask about dreams, candy canes, crushes, ships, opinions, Poptropica, rocks, experiences we’ve had, things that are even more completely unrelated to Poptropica… basically, ask us anything(clean)! There isn’t a deadline for Qs, since I’m accepting them all week long. They’ll be posted on Mondays save I die or get REALLY sick. Then I’ll reschedule or something. (Can ghosts use touchscreens?) Ask away!

If you’re wondering how watching cartoons went, BOTH of them fell asleep on me! 😁 It was honestly really cute and I’ll send you guys a picture later, but they were out until Harvey woke up and went home (after apologizing about a million times) and I put Pop to sleep. So fun night! But I gotta crash, I’m tired too! Lucky Wing signing out, Bai guys!

(There were 2416 words today. Whoop!)

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24 thoughts on “Ask the Villains #23, rated G for Funny

  1. Vampi: WHY ARE YOU EMAILING ME
    Vampi:WEHICH EMAIL DID YOU USE?
    Vampi: nvm I’ll find it somewhere
    Vampi: also the apple juice question reactions were hilarious but onto the new Qs

    To E: are you hype for the mlp movie
    To everyone: who here watches teen titans go
    to Black Widow: parallel universe question, but are you interested in relationships
    to everyone: nya? nya!

    Liked by 1 person

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